by robinsteele1@gmail.com | Jan 19, 2015 | Children, Choices
Most of us have a good work ethic. We give work most of our creativity, attention, and energy. We come home burned out, tired, and often uninspired. Here is a new proposition: Your home life is more important than your work life. In fact, at some point, we don’t have life at home if we have given our best efforts to work (at least not the abundant life that Jesus came to give us in John 10:10).
We know what you are thinking right now…”Yeah, but if I don’t give work my best, then I will get fired. Then, my life at home will really stink. At some point, I will get ahead at work, and then things will change. I will be able to spend more time around the house and with family.”
Wrong.
Make your home life strong. That way no matter what happens at work, you will come home to a good thing. Your family will be with you forever. Jobs come and go. Make sure you get that part of your life right…first.
light saber duels occur in the Steele home
Here are 5 Ways to Keep Work and Home Separate:
1. Set boundaries on your schedule. If you don’t currently have solid start and stop times at work, then determine NOW when you are going to start and stop. If you don’t take control of your work, it will take control of you. Most jobs are never finished at “quitting time”. Have the courage to drop it and pick it up tomorrow. As a pastor, I (Robin) am never finished. Erica, as a midwife, is never finished. There are always more tasks to accomplish. There are always people that need us. We have had to get very serious about our family time. We have had to find others to cover for us in order to protect the most important part of our life: family.
2. Set boundaries on your work relationships. If you start caring more about what your co-workers think of you than what your family thinks of you, then you are in a bad spot. The relationships with your spouse and kids are more valuable than anyone else. We are often tempted to please co-workers and bosses at the expense of our family/home life. When these thoughts come to mind, it is time to re-evaluate the value you have put on these people’s opinions. Listen to the opinions of your spouse and kids (They are going to be around a lot longer than your boss and co-workers).
3. Turn everything off at mealtime. Eat as many meals as possible as a family. During meal time turn off all electronics including: television, phones, tablets, games, music (unless you have live musicians accompanying dinner time). TALK to each other. Go deep in conversations. Find topics that everyone likes to talk about. Have fun. Give everyone undivided attention. Value the thoughts and feelings of other family members.
Get your romance on in front of the kids.
4. Take regular breaks. You need days off where you think nothing about work. You need to take all of your vacation days each year. You need to plan ahead and make sure that vacation time is a priority in your family. Find things to do on a weekly basis that allows the family a reprieve from the hustle of the normal week. This is where you can channel some of your creativity (that you normally use at work) for family time.
5. Connect with Friends. We all need someone in our life who knows everything. Someone outside of the family should be ready, willing, and able to keep you accountable. The only way this can happen is if you intentionally invest in them first. Don’t be afraid to ask each other how life is going. Ask about work and home. Ask about boundaries. Encourage, uplift, and sometimes correct each other. Have fun, be vulnerable.
I’m sure that there are other things that could be added to the list. If you think of some, please add to the comments section below. We need to do something. We need to be intentional about the health of our family. We need to make our family a priority, or it will get pushed away. Your work life might be growing strong, but if it comes at the expense of your family life, that is too high of a price to pay. #notworthit
Let’s go love on our family!
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by robinsteele1@gmail.com | Oct 27, 2014 | Choices, hospital, How to deal with pain
What friend is there for you? Who are you there for?
This is an unpolished/honest post about our feelings.
Ok, here you go… We struggle telling people about Kennady’s condition. We don’t want to burden them with difficult news. We don’t want to sound weak.
There is a problem with both of those statements.
People ask us, “How is Kennady doing?” We are so thankful that people care! We are so thankful that they ask!
When we haven’t seen people in years, they ask wondering if she has progressed in ability. Can she walk now? Can she talk now? Is she more developed? Just the other day, a lady asked how Kennady was doing. We said, “She is doing good. She is healthy and strong.” The lady then asked, “Can she say anything?” We replied, “Nah, she really can’t say anything.” Then the lady added, “She can’t even say hello or hi?” We said, “No, she can’t even say hello.” TRUE STORY. That happened about 2 months ago.
When Kennady has medical procedures, people want to know how they are going. The difficulty is when things don’t go well. The procedure didn’t work. The surgery has to be redone. People of faith want answers that are positive. We believe that God is able and we eagerly wait for the answer to be positive after prayer.
What we continue to find in our journey with Kennady is that the answer is RARELY what we think it will be. It is a good answer. Because God is good. It is just different than we expected and it has some difficulty attached to it.
Here we are with another major surgery coming on Thursday.
Before, I (Robin), post something on the blog or Facebook about another challenge or surgery, I wonder: Do people really want to hear this again? Are they tired of hearing our problems? At some point, will people check out because they are tired? How many people are in for the long haul?
I guess we have to discover these answers through the process. Who is in? Who is all in? Who are the friends?
Isn’t that true for anyone or any circumstance? Some people are out and some people are in. Our true friends rise to the occasion. They are not conditional. Their relationship is not based on what they get out of it, but what they can give.
Then, all of the sudden our thinking gets turned on its proverbial ear. Who have I abandoned because their situation didn’t line up with my liking? Their path was not beneficial to me. Their pace was wearing me out. #conviction
I pray that I can be a friend in the thick and thin. I pray God surrounds us with just enough friends to carry us in the difficult times. We trust that he will.
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by robinsteele1@gmail.com | Oct 13, 2014 | random life
Why do specific coffee mugs affect the way our coffee or tea taste? Because they are more than mugs!
I (robin) was having this revelation of “mug-specialness”, when I started looking at instagram. I saw two posts from my friends within five minutes of each other saying the exact same thing.
Then, like a tragic play from Shakespeare, I put a mug in the dishwasher, it slipped from the tray and fell to its death. It wasn’t just any mug. It was from Erica’s childhood.
Our favorite drinks taste different in our favorite mugs.
Each mug has a special memory attached.
Where were you when you bought it? Who were you with when you first drank from it? Who gave you the mug?
Somehow, as we sip that warm liquid, those memories swirl around our subconscious like the sugar and cream swirl inside the mug. We are reconnected to a dear relationship, a vacation, a geographical location. We escape in a way. It is way more than a beverage. It is an experience. We are comforted, relaxed, rested.
Starbucks knows all about the power of the moment, feeling, and aesthetic value hot beverages offer and have catapulted it into a multibillion dollar business. Sure, the flavor is good, but more than that is the value we feel when we see the perfect paint color, smell the aroma, and are greeted by a barista who knows our name. When we take that mug home, we are reconnected to that coffee shop. (see my friends’ pics above)
Here are some of our favorites:
Erica’s favorite mug (thankfully, I didn’t break this one) from her childhood. Sweet memories from Uncle Ted and Aunt Laura.
Robin learned how to drive in a Saab 900 Turbo! This mug was given to his parents when they bought the car.
This mug is from Robin’s grandparents. Look closely. Paw is in the outhouse and his coffee is now ready!
This is from our favorite breakfast on vacation. Nothing beats Dottie’s in San Franscisco.
What is your favorite mug?
Where does it take you?
Who bought it for you?
Why is it a big deal?
Those are are interesting questions.
However, the biggest question we should be asking ourselves as parents: What will our kids think of when they drink from our mugs 20 years from now? We have acquired a few mugs over the last few years. Some of them are ugly, weird, pretty. We don’t consider them “valuable”. They take up the space of our cabinets. However, our kids are drinking from them in the context of YOUR PRESENT HOMELIFE. They will connect with these moments for the rest of their lives when they look at pics, smell something familiar, or drink from that $7 mug you bought at the Rain Forest Cafe on your last vacation.
What we do right now affects our kids forever. The safety of our homes and the consistency of our schedules make a difference. The attention we pay to the details of their life will be remembered when they sip a $14 cup of coffee in 2037. (That might actually be a cheap cup in that day and time.)
Don’t give up.
Keep sippin’ and rememberin’. But, at the same time, keep making memories with your kids! This week is one more chapter in your legacy.
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by robinsteele1@gmail.com | Sep 22, 2014 | Choices, random life
Trying to find a movie on Netflix that is made well and is not a disaster to watch is not fun. In fact, it is brutal.
You waste 30 minutes scrolling around, clicking on titles that you have already seen or already read the summary, hoping that the rating has changed or that this time it will be better to watch. Unfortunately, Netflix’s ability to pick movies based on your set preferences is often bad. It is difficult to access the 1000s of other movies on Netflix that are actually available because they keep showing you the same set over and over to pick from.
We have done a little bit of work for you.
Put the kids to bed, pop some popcorn, sit down with your date (spouse) and find these movies on Netflix or other online places. These are ones we discovered that are entertaining and clean. Disclaimer:This is posted as of 9/19/14. At some point, some of these might not be available.
Kon Tiki – With five loyal friends in tow, explorer Thor Heyerdal sails a fragile balsa wood raft along an ancient path some 4,300 miles across the Pacific. ACTION/ADVENTURE
Flawless – On the eve of his retirement, a disgruntled janitor persuades an unhappy executive to join him in a jewel heist in this crime drama set in London. Michael Caine stars in this move! SUSPENSE/THRILLER
The Saratov Approach – This riveting drama tells the true story of two young American missionaries held captive and brutalized for a week in a remote part of Russia. Good ACTION flick that guys and girls will like. SUSPENSE/THRILLER
Fading West – Follow Grammy-winning alt-rock band Switchfoot as they hit the road to electrify live audiences and surf the waves during their 2012 World Tour. GREAT Music and footage on this one. These guys are good examples of husbands and dads. DOCUMENTARY
An Unreal Dream: The Michael Morton Story – In 1986, Michael Morton was convicted of killing his wife in front of their young son. This documentary chronicles his quest to clear his name. DOCUMENTARY
Booker’s Place – This documentary explores an African American waiter’s bold and fateful decision to expose the true state of race relations 1960s Mississippi. This one is a bit intense. Educational and great perspective on Civil Rights in America. DOCUMENTARY
Rocky 1– Probably Sly’s best movie. It is actually a great story line and shot really well. Sylvester Stallone shot to fame as Rocky Balboa, an unknown fighter who’s given a shot at fighting world champ Apollo Creed as a publicity stunt. ACTION/ADVENTURE
Cool Runnings – When Derice Bannock’s chances of qualifying for Jamaica’s track team are dashed, he and his islander friends attempt to form a bobsled team. (It has John Candy in it. Instant Classic) COMEDY
While You Were Sleeping – Sandra Bullock plays a transit worker who rescues a handsome commuter, then pretends to be the comatose man’s fiancee while falling for his brother. ROMANTIC COMEDY
Amistad – Based on a True Story. Steven Spielberg directed this story about the 1839 revolt aboard Spanish slave ship La Amistad and the uprising’s tragic aftermath. ACTION/ADVENTURE
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by robinsteele1@gmail.com | Sep 15, 2014 | Children, Choices, hospital
UPDATE: Oct 27th, 2014 – Kennady is going in on Thursday, Oct 30 for a third try on this surgery. The surgeon failed to complete the second try because Kennady’s back was too curved for the procedure. The third will involve more technology and tactics. Read details below on why this is happening.
We would love your prayers this week as Kennady is going in for a major surgery on Tuesday. She had this same surgery last year and it was unsuccessful. Actually, the surgery was very successful and the treatment was going quite well, but she developed staph infection in her spine and 6 weeks later the procedure had to be reversed.
For the last several years, Kennady’s muscles have gotten really tight. So much so, that they are contracting her arms and legs completely and creating scoliosis in her back (curvature of the spine). This causes a lot of pain and difficulty in bathing, getting her in and out of her chair, and basically all movemnent. We have given her medicine (baclofen) in hopes of reducing this tightness. It has worked some but it has a lot of negative side effects with little success.
After a lot of prayer and stored up energy, we are retrying a surgery that will insert a medicine pump in her abdomen, with a catheter into her spine, that will automatically put the medicine directly in contact with her nervous system and muscles. This will allow the medicine to skip the ‘blood brain barrier’ and not cause the side effects. It will also allow us to use lower doses with a greater reward.
It will take around 4-5 days for the complete recovery to happen and we can go home.
We appreciate any prayer you can lift up for us. If you want to visit, it would be best to visit after Wednesday. We will be at Dell Children’s Hospital in Austin, TX.
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