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Do People Like Your Family?

Do People Like Your Family?

When people think of your family, what images or emotions come to mind?  What is your family identity?  We are passing down attributes, habits, culture, and characteristics to the next generation.  What are you passing down?  If you haven’t considered it, then NOW is the time.  Being “liked” is not the ultimate winning scenario.  It is possible that you will not be liked by some when you live out the characteristics and moral values that are Biblical.  (I just used that title to get your attention.  So far so good. 🙂  I’m not sure if people like my family, but I love it!

WAKE UP CALL: Just because your family goes to church doesn’t mean that you are passing down Biblical values.

Another WAKE UP CALL: Your best intentions don’t work Biblical values into your posterity.

Your kids are only accepting and growing into the values that you live out before them.  We must be intentional about living the life.

I wrote a mini-book to help people work through these issues.  It is 4 short chapters with questions that guide a discussion with the rest of your family.  You can get it free by signing up for our newsletter.

Our Steele family has a strong heritage of hard workers and deep faith in Jesus.  We are determined to have this culture passed down to each subsequent generation.  Each of our families are intentional about creating a home culture that cultivates each person’s individuality while at the same time staying anchored to eternal, Biblical truths.

  • Salvation – Jesus saves us and we want to participate in others finding Him.
  • Forgiveness – We have been forgiven and willingly forgive everyone else.
  • Love – We want to live out love in our neighborhood.  We want to participate in the resolution.
  • Integrity – If we said it, we meant it.  We will follow up on it.
  • Hard-Working – If you don’t work, you don’t eat.

One thing that we do each summer is host a summer camp for all the kids in our family that are 6-12 years of age.  The moms, dads, aunts, uncles, and grandparents all chip in and help lead the kids.  There is a whole lot of fun.  The strong prayer culture created by our grandmother is passed down.  Most of all, we live together for a week and share ourselves with each other.  Wow!  We host it at our family’s ranch in the Texas Hill Country.  A very rough, yet beautiful ranch with cows, creeks, and a lot of critters.

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For more pics, you can follow the Instagram hashtag: #steelefamilycamp14

 

Would you like to plan something like this Family Camp?  We can help you plan it!  email us: hey@mademeaningful.com 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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What Impact Do Movies and Games Really Have on my Kids?

What Impact Do Movies and Games Really Have on my Kids?

IMG_0139We grew up in the 80s and 90s.  Watching movies all night at a sleep-over or playing video games in pajamas all day was/is normal.  It is relaxing, entertaining, and engaging with others.

Robin’s Background
I grew up in a strict home.  In fact, we didn’t have a television until I was around 18 years of age.  We would rent TVs and movies every once in a while (during Olympics or World Cup). We went to maybe 3 or 4 movies at a theater while growing up.

Erica’s Background

I grew up with full access to the tv and video games most of the time.  My first records (yes, record is correct) were Madonna (which accidentally got melted when I left it beside the oven) and Cyndi Lauper.  My mom was pretty firm about us not watching soap operas, horror movies, and The Simpson’s.  I am sure this provided a nice buffer from the really bad stuff. Right?  The older I got, my dad would pick us up on the weekends and take us to the movies.  I am pretty certain I saw most of the movies that came out in the late 80’s through the mid 90’s, not to mention the hours and hours we spent on the Nintendo playing Super Mario Brothers or Duck Hunt.  Now you all have a clear picture of why I am so dysfunctional.

Now, we have been married for over 15 years and have three young kids.  Our kids absolutely love movies and video games.  As parents, we do too.  However, we are now responsible for selecting and/or protecting our kids from the damaging effects of media.  The question begs to be answered:

What impact do movies and video games really have on my kids?  Is it “just a game” or “just a movie”?

Do we need to buckle down and restrict anything that vaguely looks violent, sexual, or profane?  OR  Should we allow media with different opinions help us grow and develop our world view and theology?

Ralph Waldo Emerson (who was a long way from being a Bible thumping Christian) once said, “A person will worship something, have no doubt about that.  We may think our tribute is paid in secret in the dark recesses of our hearts, but it will come out.  That which dominates our imaginations and our thoughts will determine our lives, and our character.  Therefore, it behooves us to be careful what we worship, for what we are worshipping, we are becoming.

Check out this information from the National Institution of Health:

Not all television programs are bad, but data showing the negative effects of exposure to violence, inappropriate sexuality and offensive language are convincing – American Academy of Pediatrics

The amount of violence on television is on the rise.  The average child sees 12,000 violent acts on television annually, including many depictions of murder and rape. More than 1000 studies confirm that exposure to heavy doses of television violence increases aggressive behaviour, particularly in boys.  Other studies link television or newspaper publicity of suicides to an increased suicide risk.

If you are interested, you can get all the sources for this data on the actual report, Click here.

Anything taken in, in large quantities, shapes who we are.  We are feeding the flesh in us, either good or bad.

Jesus said, “Your eye is a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is good, your whole body is filled with light. But when your eye is bad, your whole body is filled with darkness. And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is!” Matthew 6:22 

Paul said, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

Where do we draw the line?  

There are some REALLY good rating systems out there that provide parents valuable information about movies and video games.

We hate hearing from parents that they had to turn a movie off or walk out of the theater.  This is a waste of time and money.  YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE CAUGHT BY SURPRISE WHILE WATCHING A MOVIE IN THE THEATER OR AT HOME.  YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE EMBARRASSED IN FRONT OF YOUR KIDS ANY MORE.  Really, there are no more excuses.  You can take back the authority and guard your family from content that will lead them in the wrong direction.

Things we consider when picking out a movie or video game for our family:

  1. Are there themes in the movie that we are not comfortable with?  What world view is portrayed?  What is the point of the narrative?
  2. How much sexual content is in the movie?  We are not interested in movies that portray immoral relationships.  We don’t want to see nudity, making out, or anything beyond.  Besides the negative message, the truth is that two actors are participating in physical activity that is not Biblical while shooting the movie or game.
  3. What kind of violence is in the movie or game?  Why is it violent?
  4. What kind of profanity is used in the game or movie?  We are not interested in hearing profanity.
  5. Why are we watching this movie?  Is it purely for entertainment value, or is it for educational value?  Both?  The answer to this question then directs us to slightly different standards.

 

We suggest that each family find a boundary that fits your family and stick with it.  Erica and I use the resources below to pick out things for our family that are entertaining and wholesome.  There is some really good content out there.  You need to do some research first!

 

RESOURCES

kidsinmind

 Kids in Mind reviews ALL the movies released to the theater and tons of videos on DVD.  It’s a great resource to find out how much sexual, violent, and profane content is in each movie.  These reviews are specific/detailed without spoiling the plot of the movie.

 

esrb

ESRB Rating system for video games – like secular movie rating systems.  It’s not perfect.  Spiritual messages are not covered in ESRB.

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PLUGGED IN – rates movies and games from a Christian moral standard.  This site is good to get a gage on the overall theme and concept of the media.

 

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APOLOMEDIA – in-depth blogs on specific video games and HOW TO set guidelines for your kids smartphone, XBOX and PS3.



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It’s Not Just a Game (BOOK)- Can a game carry a spiritual message?  What do video games have to say about God?  The Bible?  The Devil?  And even Jesus?  Isn’t it just a game?  This book answers these questions and more.

 

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Mama and The Monster

Mama and The Monster

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Barbara Steele reading the Bible

One of mom’s greatest roles is to comfort in the middle of pain.  Kids are constantly scared of the dark… especially thunderstorms.  Robin’s dad, Rob Steele, is an incredible writer.  The other day he posted this amazing story of his mom calming the storm.

Mama and the Monster!

Something was intruding on my dream; there were distant rumbles of thunder coming from an approaching storm, but that was not it. This was more of a high-pitched scritch, scitch, scriiiiitch that repeated itself every few minutes. My heart started pounding, and I knew it was happening again. SOMETHING was in the room. I could hear it shuffling over by Randy’s bed. There it came again, that scratching squeak like somebody dragging their nails over a chalkboard.   I lay there frozen in fear of the unknown THING that was creeping up on my bed ever so slowly.  Just then the lightning cracked, and I saw very clearly outlined, a weird shadow of the beast that had come to get me.

This wasn’t the first time that this had happened. Usually if I called for Mama, she came and made all the bad stuff go away. This time my little 5-year-old mind had conjured up a monster that was so evil and big I knew there was only a few seconds left before it got me. I sucked in a lungful of air and gave out a piercing shriek for Mama that let everybody in the family know about the monster. Daddy even knew about it and came flying into the room ready for combat. Mama was right behind him, and when she saw I was not being dismembered or being dragged out the window by the thing, she told Daddy to go back to bed.

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Kennady Told the Therapist, “Bye!”

Kennady Told the Therapist, “Bye!”

When does every word matter?  When things have been really quiet, each new word seems to carry much more deep meaning.  Our daughter, Kennady was born with a severe brain abnormality and has significant development delay.  One of her major set backs is not being able to verbally communicate.  If you haven’t heard that story, you can get  more info here.  How frustrating it must be to have something to say and no way to say it!

Some of her amazing teachers from Negley Elementary

Some of her amazing teachers from Negley Elementary

Her amazing teachers at school have been working with her for a long time with an augmentative communication device.  Basically, a computer mounts onto her wheelchair with a large screen. She has switches mounted to each side of her head rest.  She is able to click the switches by moving her head from side to side.  She can toggle through different word choices with one switch and then select and “say” the word through the computer.  She struggles moving her head because of her lack of muscle control.  This means when she clicks on words to say them we often wonder if she is actually meaning to say the word or not.

A few weeks back, she was in the middle of therapy at school and was getting tired.  She began to fuss at the therapist by  whining and crying. Her nurse, Kimberly, positioned herself directly in Kennady’s face and said, “Kennady, it would be much easier for you to use your device and tell the therapist that you are done.”  Then, Kennady used her head to click the command and the computer said, “Bye!”

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The Faith of a Tween-Ager!

The Faith of a Tween-Ager!

The Bollingers! (a while back)

Jason and Holly Bollinger are amazing parents and pastors.  For the last several years Erica and I have grown very close to them as we have pastored side-by-side in San Marcos, TX.  We are a bit sad because they will be moving and we won’t see them as much.  We asked them to send us a post for our blog. Here are Holly’s thoughts:

THE FAITH OF A TWEEN-AGER!

Every once in a while in parenting, you are caught off guard by your kid doing something that seems to fill your soul. I know some people really enjoy the baby years with their kids, but I find my kids to surprise me more and more with the soul-filling as they get older.

We have three tween-agers. Our house is rich with drama, puberty, volume, and opinions.  Our house is also rich with three kids of ministers trying to find their way into their own faith.  We try to protect our kids from feeling like Pastor’s kids, but we do our best to equip and encourage them into a faith journey of their own.  Some of the greatest joys come from watching them work this out.  More and more one of them will pray a prayer that brings tears to our eyes.  More and more they’re seeing ways to love others well.  It’s refreshing to watch them grow…not because they were forced or assigned, but because they want to.

As tween-agers, Sundays can be challenging.  Some days they relate more to the younger kids and play with them, and some days that act more like teenagers and have an actual interest in what’s going on.  We try to give them room to play while trying to lead them to a greater appreciation of what’s happening around them.  All of our kids really love music, but at a party after church a while back one of them pulled me aside.  “Daddy, when you and Mommy were singing that song, I felt tears come to my eyes and I felt something inside of me.  I felt the Spirit coming over me.”

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